January 5, 2017

A New Year... A New Challenge...A New Life

Hello 2017...a few days late. Story of my life since November, huh? This poor lil space has been so neglected due to life, frustrations, happenings, depression, job stresses and just a plain old disheartened spirit.

December 2016 was quite different than December 2015 and I started a post looking back on where I was last holiday season. I was blogging about gift guides, cohosting a holiday linkup, talking about parties, food and traditions, scouring the Internets for the best buys and sharing in the joy of the hustle and bustle on other blogs.

Last month...I posted a total of five times. F I V E! During the busiest and most festive time of the year. I'd blame it all on work, however that would be a lie. It wasn't 100% work, maybe 85% which is still high when you think about it right? Quite often I was too tired to even think about the computer, or I was teaching or I was hanging out with family for dinner or just sitting trying to find my center.

The few times I opened up this space I'd write a sentence or two and then get stuck. Because that's what I've felt the past two months, stuck.

Stuck in a job I don't really care for but I know is a good experience.

Stuck in someone else's home.

Stuck feeling nervous, anxious, worried, fearful and stressed.

Stuck thinking about a possible medical issue which keeps popping up.

Stuck with thoughts of doubts, sadness and nostalgia in my head.

Stuck comparing where I was last year and where everyone else seems to be while I'm in this place.

Stuck. Stuck. Stuck.

Being stuck SUCKS.

As you can imagine, posts like this were not what I wanted when everyone was posting happy, happy, joy, joy, party, party life is grand. Not only did I feel whiny, I felt annoyed I was the only one feeling this way. The only one 'going through something' which I know is not true at all. Everyone has something they are dealing with and right now this feeling of stuck is my burden.

I'd like to say I've got this new mantra for the New Year and I've changed my mindset. That would only be 75% true. I am adapting a 'IT WILL ALL WORK OUT' thought process when I can, because it all has worked out so far. I was able to go home for Thanksgiving. I was able to go home to surprise my family. I was able to take off for Christmas and I was able to have a quiet New Years. Missing out on those were my big fears when I applied for this job, and lookie there, Pinky, it all worked out.

2017 has started with  a bang, both good and bad. Good I'll share next week, stay tuned it's big. The bad, yeah kind of tough. Someone quite without notice, which took away weekend help, I'm losing a kids care person and an overnight person at the end of the month, which I just learned about this week. Yeah, lots to work around and multiple puzzles to solve so NOT BORING.

My challenge is to keep the positive in focus, to trust in Him, to not cry overtime something goes wrong and to embrace this trying season of life. Because soon, it will pay off. SOON it will all make sense, I just have to hold on, with that hope for the new life down the road.

14 comments:

Kathy@MoreCoffeeLessTalky said...

2016 was tough for you so i hope that 2017 is much better.

Nikki @ makeupHER said...

I know sometimes when life has you down in the dumps it really takes all of you to think positive. I feel for you with the whole feeling stuck. I was pissy around the holidays because I couldn't be with my family and my husband has to study for a work exam and I just wasn't feeling it. I decided in 2017 not to let that stuff bring me down and to just think of all the positive times. I really do hope all these stuck problems work it self out quickly for you! Hugs!!

Missy said...

I used to have similar troubles and it stinks. Choosing to not feel helpless, positive and in charge of your life takes a lot of effort. Allow yourself some time. I cannot wait to hear the good news! Here's to a better 2017 for you!

Jen said...

Here is to an amazing 2017 for you! You deserve it!

Ashley Brickner said...

So sorry that 2016 was tough for you but wishing you the HAPPIEST 2017, love!

Brianne said...

I'm sorry that you're feeling stuck & that 2016 wasn't the kindest to you. I hope that 2017 is so much better. I like your mantra of "it'll all work out" Thinking of you!

The Siberian American said...

Girl, I definitely felt that way all of December too! It was hard to show up to the blog. Also, I'm not going to lie. I thought your blog title meant you were pregnant! Oops. Haha.

Erin LFF said...

Hi, friend!!! I have missed your blog and I have missed blogging/keeping up with y'all in general. I'm sorry for the tough stuff life has dealt you, but I hope you know I've been thinking of you- truly and I hope 2017 is SO GOOD to you and your family. I want to do better about keeping in touch this year w/ my bloggy friends!!

Lisa { Showered With Design } said...

I love how honest you are about this! and know you are NOT alone. I've felt stuck with my blog the past YEAR! I have all these ideas and can't seem to get myself to write it down and start it all up again. It's like I am missing that GO GETTER motivation I had before. Everything will all workout :)

Sara Elizabeth Miller said...

Go. To. The. Doctor. I say that with all the love in my heart and every fiber of my being... I get that it's 1... expensive and 2... time you don't have... but one of my friends was just diagnosed with lymphoma after going in for back pain. Take care of you. That's my advice (do as I say, not as I do).... love ya, girlie. Hang in there.

Kristen @ See You In A Porridge said...

medical issues are no good girl, go to the doctor!
i'm assuming your good news is what you shared on IG, for which i say congrats again! so unbelievably happy for you.
2017 started off with a bang for me too, but all bad. i am truly hoping the rest of the year is better than the first week. i really hope it's a good year for you as well.

Nikki said...

Medical issues are not fun I hope and pray you or whoever if having the issues is ok! I miss our chats! Between your crazy life and mine its definitely hard but know I have been thinking about you and praying for you!

BLovedBoston said...

Crossing my fingers that everything is okay and picks up to how you want it to be soon!! You're a fighter girl!

Julie @ Just the Joy's said...

Hang in there girl, you are doing AWESOME and BIG things! I can totally relate to being "stuck" and not always having happyhappy joy joy things to write about. You are definitely not alone there! But that's the true reality of life and life isn't always perfect! We definitely have to learn to embrace the imperfections! I'm with you on that one, constantly a work in progress! ;) Happy New Year!