Or, the biggest trip yet. Hard to believe friends, hard to believe. Even so, here we are again. My birthday. [Well, tomorrow is the actual day, but I rarely post on Saturdays, so today. We talk today.] The start of a new year, a blank slate. Staring 34 in the face with fear, trepidation, excitement, thankfulness, joy, humility and hope.
364 days ago, Le Husband and I started our great European adventure [which I STILL haven't finished putting here, le sigh]. We toured Europe for a month and then came home and changed states. The past year has flown by it seems, just whoosh.
There have been moments when days felt like years and minutes couldn't pass by quick enough. Days, even on the lake, dragged as we couldn't find a job or our footing in this new space. Our plan was to live with family for a month, maybe two tops. Somehow two turned into six and suddenly we were celebrating the holidays not in a place of our own.
Jobs. Oh, jobs. Ones I applied for back in the summer are still posted on Linkedin. Yeah, those easy jobs I thought I could float into, yep, never happened. Instead, Le Husband worked commissions only for a new company and I took a job I knew I would hate from day one. But, it was the only thing out there and we needed to start making money.
The tears. The frustrations. The feelings of failure. They were all felt during 33. Two of my favorite number, but quite possibly the hardest year of my entire life. Thirty three has challenged me more than any year. Thirty three pushed me beyond my expectations and outside of my comfort zone. Honestly, I don't know where my 'comfort zone' is anymore because everything seems to be uncomfortable.
33 was hard. Beyond hard. Life changing hard. 33 was also incredible. 33 was adventure. Taking a chance. 33 was finally putting words to action and leaping into the unknown. 33 was finding my what and now my why. 33 was falling in love with group fitness and decided to chart a new course. 33 was fresh air and catching my breath all in one.
34 starts as a home owner. 34 is living in a new state and not having a family birthday dinner. 34 is putting the birthdayaholic aside for life and others. 34 is beast mode. 34 is looking inside my heart and declaring what I want for my future. 34 is close to the best shape I've ever been in since college. 34 is lonely at times, still. 34 is learning who I want to be and rebuilding my tribe. 34 is new, fresh, unsoiled, full of possibilities and rife with new challenges. 34 is redemption. 34 is the year of unstoppable.