Thoughts on a Thursday {Water Your Own Grass}

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Let's talk comparison, shall we? Everywhere you look it seems someone is skinnier, better, prettier, smarter. They have more accomplished, have more followers, more opportunities and post perfect content. How quickly what we have looks less shiny when we see what everyone else has. How quickly we forget what we've worked for what we have. How quickly the demons in our brain can come out and play, leading us down a destructive path.

Full discourser, I had a moment last week when audition results weren't what I wanted. I spent a few moments looking online at all the people who made presenter last year, or who have been trainers for years. I looked online and thought 'wow, must be so nice. they have it all and I don't. I want to be them'. Which of course, was ridiculous. And stupid. And just a wallow of a wallow.  But, it got me thinking. How often do we look and covet something we see on the other side? How often do I worry about the grass in someone else' lawn, instead of looking at my lawn and taking care of it myself?

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I used to know someone who publicly supported people but quietly, judged them. Behind backs it would be constant comparison and judging comments. At first it was nothing, just chatter. But then I started to talk back, saying nasty things too. And suddenly I wasn't as content as I used to be with life. Suddenly things were competitions and nasty thoughts when someone was doing well. Talk about gross right? I managed to pull myself out of the toxic mentality after both sisters made a comment to me about my attitude.  I remembered, talking smack about and worrying about other people did nothing to help me get better. This person continued to kept on and on which soon became so draining it added to why I realized I needed to end our relationship. Being sucked into this daily 'comparison' game messed with my perspective and it was a breath of fresh air when I was able to remove the mentality.

If you see something go for it. Put in the work. Do the tough stuff. If you get knocked down, take a breath, recite an affirming mantra and stand right back up again. That will get you closer to your goals, not wishing or knocking down people who have already done the time. If you see someone hustling and rocking, tell them. If you have a question, ask someone. Women are uniting more and more and in this great big world there is enough sunshine for everyone. I am cheering for you to succeed and so willing to help you anyway I can if you want help.

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One of my favorite quotes is "Your vibe attracts your tribe" because it easily reminds me of what I want in my circle of friends. I want people who work hard for their dreams. Who support each other instead of being envious behind backs. People who get up and dust themselves off after they fall flat on their face trying something new. Life is tough and can be really hard. When things are the darkest dark you need those people to help you find the light the way you need. Sometimes that's commiserating in the dark, other times it's thrusting you into the light and sometimes it's just texting 'love you'.

I heard a quote the other day which said '50% of our happiness is chalked up to DNA disposition'. Some of us are born Tiggers and some of us are born Eyores and that's okay. If everyone were a Tigger life would be waaaay to crazy, right? Ten percent of our happiness is circumstances in life and the rest of the 40% is our attitude in how we handle this circumstances. We have a choice, to covet the beautiful green lawn of someone else, or water and care for our own grass so it grows, too.

What's Up Wednesday {April}

Taking a bit of artistic license with this link up today. April basically consisted of three major things. Visiting my sisters where I met my niece, celebrating my birthday [in Vegas and at home] and not making the cut for an audition. Below are the highlights from each event, cheers to a pretty awesome April.

Arizona Trip:
Oh my heart, this trip. Everything I could have wanted, and more. It was all the sister time. All the baby time. All the warm weather. Lots of puppy love and ALL.THE.BABY! Seriously, my niece is so precious and I wanted to eat her up all the time. She was struggling with sleep while we were there, so Babyspice and I helped out mama Sportyspice in the mornings which means we enjoyed lots and lots of baby girl snuggles. We had pool time, food time, cleaning time, sunset photoshoot time, silly auntie time, singing time and just so much fun. I cried when Babyspice left and I cried when I left. Being so far away is so damn hard, so DAMN hard. I can't wait until next month when we will all be together again.

Oh yeah, I HAD A BLATE! My girl Courtney lives in AZ and we FINALLY met up. This blate has been five years in the making and it was the best. Chickfila with the kids and all the laughs. She is as pure as sunshine and just one of my faves, LOVE YOU GIRL!

Las Vegas Trip:
The drive from Phoenix was super easy, but kind of nerve wracking. There were multiple parts where my phone didn't get signal, which had me concerned since I didn't know where I was going, ha. Scenery was gorgeous, though. I was able to stop crying by the 2nd hour, because yes, I was a mess leaving. Le Husband was in Vegas for work and I joined him at the tail end of the trip and enjoyed two nights on his company since he was working. Thursday night we did dinner at Ceasar's Palace and then walked the strip because it's our favorite thing to do when in Vegas.

Friday we were both up early for a work out, then a quick trip down the strip to change hotels to the Linq. Love staying there, except their wifi is booty, bah. We ate breakfast/lunch at Hash House, which is our FAVORITE spot. We randomly started eating there back in 2010 when we stumbled up on it and it has become our go to for brunch. Word to the wise, they don't do reservations so get their early. The rest of the day was spent relaxing and then we made our way down to Fremont Street. Le Husband had a friend also in town and we met him downtown after our delicious dinner. I'd never been to Fremont Street and LOVED it. So much fun and such a change from the strip. Old foggies over here couldn't make it much longer than midnight, haha.

Saturday we enjoyed the gorgeous weather, ate delicious food and then headed off to the airport for our flight. Le Husband enjoys perks as a working guy and we were able to hang in one of the clubs while we waited which was so nice. Big fan of free food and drinks. The flight was pretty chill and we landed late on Saturday in Nashville where we stayed the night close to the airport. The trip was a whirlwind but so very fabulous for my birthday. Really made turning 35 so wonderful.

This is 35 (Birthday}:
April brought the beginning of my 35th trip around the sun. Am I where I expected? Nope. Would I trade it? Nope. College Pinky had me a SAHM with two kids and one on the way at this age. Right out of college Pinky had me traveling the world with the Peace Corps. Just married Pinky had me with a kid and still in Virginia. Funny, huh? I honestly admit I do wish life was a bit more settled and dreams were a bit more in grasp, but that's life right? I am beyond blessed because my family and friends truly made my day amazing. So much love for year 35!

Not Getting Presenter: 
Talk about a tough pill to swallow. I shared all of my journey here and truly felt I had a shot. A real shot. A GOOD SHOT and to have it not happen hurts. I honestly don't think I can expand on my post *here* so if you want the whole story give it a click. Almost good enough, but just not this year. I'm determined to get better so next year can be my year. Thank you all for your support from the beginning and through the disappointment. Your faith makes me smile.


How was your April?!??!?

Happiness Is {Weekend Edition}

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... a slow weekend at home with Le Husband with NO RENOVATION work done.

... helping T-Bone clear his yard.

... playing in the pink azalea walkway like a child at T-Bone's house.

... a bone in ribeye, homemade french fries, grilled veggies all cooked by Le Husband on the Green Egg.

... losing all sense of time with an engrossing book.

... sunny and 75 degree weather.

... having a caring best friend [boff] who treats my sisters like her own and spoils my lil niece.

... sleeping for eleven hours.

... a moving sermon online Sunday morning.

... adorable animal shows on television for Earth day.

... kickball practice with good friends, complete with lots of belly laughs.

... another home cooked meal [fire roasted chicken thighs, mushrooms, mac and cheese] on the Green Egg.

... gearing up for TAMPA this weekend.

How was your weekend? What was your happiness?

Weekly Wins {Grasping at Straws}

My word, what a week. Coming back from a fabulous ten day trip  in the warm west, right into the cold freezing snow of the East, coupled with long days of training, teaching and programming, topped off with some bummer news midweek made for just a week I'd rather not do again.

I miss my family. I miss my niece. I miss the warm weather.

I'm beyond bummed I missed out on a goal I set for myself.

My body is all over the place because of food and drink choices the past two weeks.

But, still we look at the good. The small little pieces of the week worth celebrating. They get a shout out because they play JUST as big of a role in my life as the defeats and bummers.

... Can't talk about the week without mentioning THE BIRTHDAY! Thank you all for your sweet wishes, they meant so much to me. 35 is shaping up to be a wonderful year because I feel more confident, at peace with who I am and stronger than ever. Having family and friends think about me truly made my week.


... I had a pretty big goof up during my BODYPUMP class on Tuesday but the class just rolled with it. Afterwards I spoke with a couple who I adore and when I laughed at my ooops the woman said "even with mistakes, you're still the best instructor here". Talk about a WOW moment.

... Sportyspice texted the family that lil bean slept for FOUR hours in a row the past two nights, woop!

... Wednesday I posted about not making the team and the responses was overwhelming. I had debated even saying anything, since it was still raw and devastating, but I'm so glad I did. The public pump ups were amazing, the private DMs were inspiring and the settling of peace of mind did wonders for my emotions. THANK YOU for supporting me.


... After a SPRINT class on Wednesday, a member and I walked out to our cars together where we chatted for ten minutes. We spoke about life, teaching, future and it was just a GREAT moment of getting to know another human being. Someone who is similar to me, despite are big age difference. Grateful to daily impact people's lives and meet new personalities.

... Yesterday was my last day of physical therapy, so now I do the work on my own.

Wishing you and yours a fabulous weekend, hoping you're somewhere WARM!

Thoughts on a Thursday: ALMOST

Almost. One of the toughest words. You're there, but not quite. So close you can envision the next step, yet still so far away. Trying your BEST to be MOST, then learning nope.

Almost. 2018 began with a brave step into the unknown. March brought another brave step as I pursued my dream at a live audition. Earlier this week I received the news I would not be moving on to join the presenter team this year, ending my journey for the moment. The talent at auditions was fire, cream of the crop incredible and I'm so thrilled for those moving on this year. They are going to shine this year and I can't wait to see what they bring to the team. I am also beyond grateful I was picked to audition, able to meet the LMUS team in person, learn from the best and understand their philosophy. I trust their judgement and believe they know what they want every year. 

Almost. I'm not going to lie, this moment stings. BAD. It hurts more than I've shared on other social media avenues. I cried when I read the email because all of the work just went POOF in a matter of paragraphs. This was something I wanted so badly and I TRULY thought I had a good chance after the live audition. My feedback was great, I felt I did my best and the numbers seemed to be in my favor. Hearing 'no' is a swift kick to the gut as I look back on moments and wonder what if? I wanted this because I wanted to be great. I've been good at many things throughout my life but rarely, if EVER, have I been great. I seem to JUST miss the mark each time and THIS moment was so close I could taste the words, "I MADE IT".

Almost. Moments like these can be breaking or making points. Almost moments force us to look deep into our core, into our soul and decide where we go after we fail. Do we quite? Do we walk away? Do we throw our hands up and say never again? Do we grow bitter and angry? Or do we recommit? Do we learn? Do we refocus and use the failure as fuel for the NEXT CHANCE?

Almost. I am sharing this not to gain comments or 'you're great' words. I'm posting this failure to let everyone know it happens to everyone and that failing is okay. Whether you've failed something big, small, or just missed a weigh in or a fitness challenge know that FAILURE DOES NOT define you. Being brave, making the choice to try something...THAT DEFINES YOU. Standing back up after falling on your face...THAT DEFINES YOU. Choosing to persevere after being told no...THAT DEFINES YOU. Keep showing up. Keep grinding. Keep doing the work. Maybe almost this year means DAMN YES next year. Maybe it means in two years. Maybe you were ready for the team but they weren't ready for what you bring to the table. Maybe you are a margarita and they needed champagne this year. 

ALMOST now fuels my fire. Being so close means I'm THAT FAR ahead for next year. My current Les Mills journey will include focusing more on my teaching to better serve my members. To hone my craft to be the BEST I can be EACH and EVERY class. I believe in rising up stronger and better than when I fell short, so BRING.IT.ON!

Thank you for all of your support over the past few months. Thank you to everyone who saw this post yesterday on INSTAGRAM and FACEBOOK. I appreciate your words more than you know and your support of MY dreams means the world. 

Back to Life, Back to Reality

Back in town and wearing a frown. Well, not really, but kinda sorta. I happy to be home after ten fabulous days of travel, my bed felt so nice last night. Yet, my heart is sad because I miss my sisters and my lil niece something fierce after a week of glorious togetherness. Recap will be up later this week, so here are a few teasers of my trip to Arizona and Las Vegas.  

 Thank you all for your sweet birthday wishes yesterday. You sure know how to make a girl feel loved and cherished. I am beyond thankful for my 35th trip around the sun and look forward to everything this year has to offer. This right here is LOVE, HOPE, JOY, HAPPINESS and this right here is 35! Hope you have a fabulous Monday and wonderful week.

Thirty Five Years Young

Today I turn 35. Shocking and exciting. Thrilling and nerve wracking. Wow and whoa. I have a post with even more thoughts on this age coming during the week. Today I just want to say CHEERS to another trip around the sun. I am thankful and grateful for this wonderful life.

Weekly Wins: Sisters and Baby

The three ANTONDAS are together. My heart is so full! The best win, ever. Plus one special lil girl is joining in the party this time and I am so very much in love. My two best friends and a baby girl, what could be better?

Wishing you and yours the best weekend. I'm soaking up the Arizona sunshine and baby girl smiles.

C U R R E N T L Y {APRIL}

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showering in my OWN home because our shower works...with HOT WATER! HUZZAH!

cultivating the perfect look in our master bath, picking up all the last lil accessories.

expecting the next ten days to be pretty fanFREAKINGtastic. #birthdaytrip #sissyreunion #babyniece

buying nothing but the necessities right now. #lightattheendofthetunnel #soon 

cooking healthier foods because I will be on a beach at the end of the month, eeek!

believing THIRTY-FIVE could be my best year yet, cheers to BIRTHDAY MONTH!!!

loving I leave for Arizona this week to see baby niece. weeeedeeedeeeee

reading books, allllll the booooooks! #historicalfictionkick

anticipating audition results. this month, people, eeeek! #graceforeitheroutcome #wantitbad

wearing workout clothes with NO JACKET! PTL! Spring is happening here.

renovating nothing. FLIP FLOP NOTHING, HALLELUJAH AND HALLELUJAH!

Goodbye // Hello

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goodbye...

... cold wintery weather days with snow and temperatures below 40 degrees.

... heavy annoying jackets.

... first quarter of the year. wow, you went by SO QUICKLY.

... layers upon layers upon layers because we can't figure out the weather.

... four seasons in ONE WEEK!

... Lent! The tomb is EMPTY!

... a month of extreme ups and downs.

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hello...

... visit out west to see family and celebrating my birthday in Las Vegas.

... birthday month. I no longer celebrate a month, but I can't think April without thinking birthday.

... birthday month for some of my sweet sweet darling friends lil girls. #lovesharingthemonth

... the launch of BODYATTACK100. SO SO SO SO SO GOOD!

... beautiful flowers, greenery and of course, pollen.

... April showers, bringing May flowers.

... first kickball tournament of the season.

... SPRING! SPRING! SPRING!

TBB: All things S P R I N G

Hello, friends and happy Easter. I hope those of you who celebrate the Risen Lord had a wonderful Sunday of worship and those of you who do not celebrate, I hope you  had a wonderful weekend. Our Easter was spent worshiping and then enjoying food together with friends. Eater away from family is tough for me, as I'm a tradition QUEEN, yet I'm slowly learning to be happy with new traditions as they are created. A photo of our weekend.

Now, onto the Monday linkup. Which I've actually done ON TIME this month, woop woop!

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1||  What three colors remind you most of Spring? Pastel Pink & Yellow and DEEP Purple for Easter.

2||  What is the first thing you add to your wardrobe in Spring? Peep toe shoes and FLIPSSSS!

3||  What is the first wardrobe item you ditch in Spring? Gloves

4|| Who mows the grass where you live? Our HOA, praise hand emoji! I garden, I don't mow!

5|| What's Spring like where you live? Spring brings us all four seasons, haha. Snow, rain, heat and cool breezes.

6|| What's your favorite thing about Spring? Watching the world awaken after being asleep for winter. Give me all the beautiful spring flowers and greenery. Buds breaking through the ground give me such a thrill.

7|| Are you a Spring cleaner? YESSS! I love spring cleaning and making everything FRESH.

8|| Are a baseball fan? Yes, which still makes me laugh. I HATED baseball and baseball players growing up because they were a pain in this soccer players rear. Wouldn't you know I married a baseball player [who played in the minors for three + years]? We both don't really care for MLB but LOVE watching and cheering on College Baseball teams.

9|| Tulips or Daffodils? When I was younger, tulips. But now, gimme a good daffodil. I think they last longer and look better in a vase as they start to whither. Tulips dying make me so sad.

10|| Favorite outdoor Spring activity? Walking outside without a jacket, grilling while enjoying a drink on the deck. Playing kickball with friends and just GETTING outside.

11|| Flowers in the ground or in pots? Growing up 99% of the plants around my house were in the ground so that's how I plant at my home. We are getting a house plant which will be potted in our living room.

12|| Car wash or wash vehicles at home? I haven't visited a car wash in two years. We take care of it at home.

13|| When do you pull out your sandals? As soon as Flip Flopping possible :)