June 18, 2013

Anticipating Life


We humans think we can do it all.

We think if we plan and hope, we can make the future we want happen.

As you know, I'm not a planner.

I'm friends with LOTS of planners {you know who you are ladies}
and have realized HOW [LITTLE] of a planner I actually am.

I'm more of a 'give me the big picture' kind of planner.

I want to know all the options,
but don't have the energy or time to plan it all out.

I know plans change, that's life.

Opportunities are granted when least expected
and sometimes they are taken away just as quickly.

And sometimes the lost opportunities turn into the best thing ever.

Sometimes the opportunity is amazing and life changing too.

But, you never know, until it happens.


Grappling with the unexpected has never been my forte.

I'm not a worrier....but NOT KNOWING drives me nuts.

I seem to think I can anticipate the change
and prepare for everything that POSSIBLY could happen.

"If I prepare myself for all the options, I will pass with flying colors."

But then, what happens when an option happens
that I'm not prepared to deal with?

I am curious by nature, but I've begun to realize that the curiosity
isn't just childlike.
But, it's more of a 'I need to know WHAT so I can figure out the HOW'.


Life is moving at a break neck pace right now
and I'm in 'uncharted territory'.

I've been in weddings but I've never planned a wedding before February.

There are so many things to do, and while I'm no longer STRESSED
to the max like before,
there are times where I think "how will it all get done"?

I have so many different lists with so many things to check off,
and right now I can't fathom having everything complete
in the short time line ahead.

Let's be clear,
I chose a short timeline, because I'm ready for the next phase,
and so is C.

We didn't want to wait longer than we needed,
we just want to get married!

And ladies, we are soooooooooo close to W-Day.

We are less than 90 days out people,



But, I'm not just getting married,
I'm also preparing to move in and live with my husband.

I know I'm one of very few women in this day and age
that chooses to NOT live with a bf or fiance before marriage,

NO judgement from me, to each their own,
but I've always been of the mindset, all or nothing [married vs not married], for my life.

In just a few months I will be LIVING with a man.

My husband.

I will no longer have MY stuff.

It will be OUR stuff and our place
and OUR decorations/decor ideas.

My lil apartment will be all packed up and some of his stuff will be packed up
and we will be figuring out what is important to us,
and what we need to let go of to make room.

Right now we have a plan for where we will be living immediately
after the wedding.

Life could throw us for a loop if it wanted of course, but
all we can do is plan for what we know.


Living with C is a vast unknown to me and it makes me nervous.

I know we will be fine and things will work out,

I TRUST God knows what He is doing,
but that doesn't mean I'm apprehensive about the future.

I've heard from multiple, multiple people that the first few months of marriage are hard
and that learning to live with each other
is part of the process [if you already don't live together].

Maybe we will be LUCKY like all those people out there that have NO ISSUES
and life is just roses and butterflies, and in no need of help
to understand a significant other.


But, maybe we will have some rough months full of fights
but also full of make ups and laughter.

I DON'T KNOW how it's going to roll
and that is no bueno in this Pink brain.


Life happens and you have to learn to roll with the punchesand TRUST and have Faith in the Lord.




Monica said...

What a great honest post! I think the best part of life is the unknown! As long as you remind yourself to take it all in stride and appreciate what you have and what you experience it will turn out right ;)

Anonymous said...

Take a deep breath and realize that everything will fall into place the way it is suppose to. I know it's almost impossible to believe that now but I am being 100% honest with you. You can do this just take it one day at a time and if you can't do that then take it one hour at a time! You got this!

Jenn said...

It will definitely be good, even if it's mixed in with some bickering and adjustments. But it will all be good and you'll be stronger as a couple after you make it through. Worrying about the what if's now might only make the issues bigger or create them where they might not have otherwise existed. So, take it day by day, look forward to the fun things and deal with the not-so-fun ones as they come. You're gonna have fun! :)

Illegally Blonde said...

My advice is to keep talking to each other. Never let communication cease. Had M and I talked more and talked before our wedding perhaps things would have gone better. Transitioning to living together full time is rough. It takes patience and kindness, the first year is rough. Just hold on. Pray through the good, bad and ugly But, be honest with each other about what you actually need vs. what you want. Walk the two-way street of compromise, but do not give up everything just to make or keep peace. You will be fine. And when all else fails, open a bottle of wine, watch you wedding video and remember why you did this in the first place. Love you!

Alana Christine said...

I'm the same way--only minus the whole getting married part. lol. Although, I am a self-proclaimed worrier, so I can literally make myself sick thinking about everything. Everything will work out and kudos for not giving in and living with him before marriage--definitely something rare these days : )

Stephanie @ Life, Unexpectedly said...

I'm a total planner, and I hate it. I'Ve been out of my comfort zone a few times, and I've gotten better accepting it and not totally freaking out. Enjoy planning your wedding and anticipating your new life together. My hubby and I didn't get to live together for 3 months after we were married since the Army wouldn't provide him with family housing given the moving schedule.. Hated it!!

Jamie said...

Wedding planning is stressful. I struggled a lot through the process. Hang in there.

Carolyn said...

Moving in with a boy is definitely an adjustment. It takes time to get used to it... so understand that. However... the memories you'll make with him in your home together are SO AMAZING and you'll cherish them. Even if they don't seem like positive memories at the time.

You and C will do great! :)