December 12, 2013

Wife Notes, a New Normal

Three months after the blessed event
and life is pretty much back to normal now.

Well, back to the NEW normal I'd say.

Being a newlywed is fun [duh I've said that how many times],
and for the most part people help keep it fun
because they ask me 'how we are doing'
or 'how's married life'?!?

At first I was nervous about answering them
without sounding too cliche.
But, then I realized, it really doesn't matter
if I sound cliche.
Right now things are super awesome still
schmoooopy fabulous. 

A wonderful, married friend of mine told me
"It can totally stay like that, if you work at it"!
Well, I know were are going to do our
darndest to make sure it stays this way.

I'm sure people scoff at my doe-eyed newlywedness,
but I like to think I've learned a thing or two
in the past three months.

Here's my three month take on marriage!


It's Good
We've acclimated to cohabitating much better than I honestly expected. The battles that I expected, haven't reared their heads whatsoever. There has been a collective effort on both sides to try and keep the peace and not disrupt each others routine too. Obviously things are different, but in a good way. When we were dating/engaged it was so different than now and I honestly can't imagine living single again. Even though we lived so close to each other, there is something to coming HOME to your spouse instead of texting your bf/fiance to find out when he'll be home or what he wants to do for dinner. Living with a dude also means the jars get opened easier, the trash gets taken out more frequently and there is no need to scream when there's a bug or spider crawling around.

It's Ugly
However, living with a dude is weird. Amazing, but weird. And full disclosure, a lil bit gross. The beautiful bathroom sink you constantly wipe down, will inherently have little hairs from your husband shaving on it....constantly. The living room couch will sometimes also serve as a dresser or jacket holder. Men inherently leave the toilet seat up [tmi, sorry] and sometimes forget they are in the presence of a female. We've also had to learn the living in a one bathroom apartment dance. Literally, haha! There is also the small lil sharing of the remote dance we do weekly. We have chosen to not pay for a DVR, so any show we want to watch, we have to negotiate in real time. Sound of Music for a Saturday of football, works for me! There are also tests in patience and biting ones tongue before speaking. I've learned you really need to pick your battles and 99.9% of the time one of us is just being too sensitive and it's a moot point. Marriage is about compromise and that's a lesson you learn every day. It's not all me adjusting though. Two of my favorite C quotes regarding living together are "Yup, I'm living with a girl, there's a mat outside my door" and "Oh totally smells like girl in here". Sorry honey, sometimes men stink ;)!

It's Affirming
Wow, is marriage affirming. I thought I knew love before C, and I thought I knew happiness, but I'm experiencing it NOW! I honestly have never been happier in my life, nor have I ever felt so loved. I live for the simple, sleepy "Good night wife" with a kiss at night and cherish the forehead kiss every morning before I leave for work. Our little, special, only us moments together are just a bit brighter. And life is so funny and laugh inducing it's crazy. I don't think I've ever laughed or smiled as much as I have in the past three months. My husband is funny, way funnier than I ever knew. And he's kind and generous and takes care of me. I still catch myself thinking "wow, he picked ME!" and "God picked him for ME"! We may argue, get frustrated and side eye each other, but I know he's mine forever. He's my person, my companion, my supporter, my lover and my best friend. We are forever bonded and blessed by God and I cherish the man who will be with me for the rest of my life. 

I look forward to learning more about each other,
and about ourselves on our journey 
in life together. 


My bit of cheer today is from 
Tuesday night's CAPS game. 

We were losing 0-3 and came back to win
6-5 in a shoot out. 

I love going to games with C and it was
a ton of fun watching the team win.


Jenn said...

I'm glad (and not surprised) that things are going so well, but I'm really happy that you all have adjusted to cohabitation well--it CAN be a challenge, but it doesn't have to be. I'm glad that you all have found the balance.
The bathroom thing will test any relationship. ANY relationship haha.
I definitely agree with you that there are simple pleasures in coming home to the person you love, or having them come home, not just meeting at each others' places, etc. It's that feeling of "home" together that's wonderful!

Lauren said...

Glad married life is agreeing with you! I agree - my husband and I lived together for a few years before we got married but it just felt more special once we were officially husband and wife!

Illegally Blonde said...

So happy for you two. That was a hard adjustment for us and one we never quite got the hang of. Keep working at it every day and never stop remembering why you got married.

Anonymous said...

Cute post, totally true about living with a guy! We bought our house right before we got married and I am SO grateful for the double sinks. That's now a definite vs. would be nice for any future homes. :)

Courtney B said...

Ooooh I just love this! You two are the CUTEST!
And your friend was so right. It can totally stay like this! Eric and I were getting new phones once and the guy helping us asked how long we'd been married. We were coming up on 4 years and he was shocked! He thought we were definitely newly weds which made me so happy! And when I was pregnant? It was like our honeymoon phase all over again. So much happiness! So marriage is a lot of work (even if it doesn't feel like it at times) but it's so worth it to keep those butterflies in the relationship :)

Monica L said...

Awww what a nice post! Its great to hear you two are adjusting so well :)

Kelly B. said...

this is so sweet, and true! M and I lived together for a few years before we got married (2.5 to be exact) so that hasn't changed in any way, but the way I look at our fights and arguments (especially house related) totally has. It's become "this is my WHOLE life, for forever. Is this fight about the dishes worth it?" ... it just FEELS different. ya know? haha

Cece said...

Glad everything is going well and that you are adjusting. The bottom line is we have to compromise and work together and it sounds like you got that covered. Some day you will have a 2nd sink and all will be right with the world. : )

{Jessica} said...

You two are too sweet. And don't apologize for being too schmoopy - you totally deserve to enjoy this newlywedded bliss! So happy for you, sweet friend:)

Stephanie @ Life, Unexpectedly said...

I was confronted with probably the grossest thing about guys (won't put into detail, TMI-alarm) the day after our wedding. From there, it could only get better :-) Luckily, hubby is very good about putting the toilet seat down.

Looking forward to the 6-months update :-)

Brittany said...

I am so happy that things are going well for you guys :)

Carolyn said...

Love this! :) And it's all so true!! Marriage can stay super special! I promise! It may not have the same newlywed excitement, but there's something just as wonderful as having your set routine and knowing you're going to do this for the rest of your lives!!!