April 12, 2019

Dear BOB

Oh, baby. How do I even start this? I honestly can't believe your due date is so close. Next week. Four days away. Here we are. And man, I'm so all over the place, sweetie.

I am so ready to meet you. To know who you will look like. What your name will be. I can't wait to learn if we will be putting you in pinks or blues [and other colors too]. What color will your hair be? And your eyes? Meeting you also means you'll be HERE, in the world. Outside of my body. Which has me excited and nervous.

Excited because nine months is a long time. A long process. A lot of work on my body. So many changes. So many miraculous changes. Nine months my body has been your home and I'm BEYOND grateful to have housed you safely for so long. I know many mommies would have loved to have their babies in their bodies for 39 weeks and I don't take it for granted my body continues to keep you safe. You are quiet and safe from the world right now and I love that. I love that I can protect you. That I can control what is around you and what you get to be near.

Because soon, that changes. Soon you will be here, in the world. And try as I might to protect you I can't keep you in another bubble. You will grow and be around others and I can't be everywhere. If I'm honest, I'm already nervous about keeping you safe from harm and have already thought about when you get your license. #crazyiknow I'm sure every parent freaks out, right?

And then I think about how I'm still in charge with you in my belly. When I need a nap, I take one. When I want to read a book, I do. I can sit still. I can do a lot. I can do nothing. You come with me and it's easy. Once you're here, though, that's out the window. And I keep trying to tell myself to soak up these moments. TO EMBRACE these little bits of just YOU AND ME time. Because right now, you are my lil secret. No one really can tell when you move. When you're quiet. What you're doing. It's just you and me kid and that's so special. And, I like being able to sleep when I want ;)!

Sweet BOB, I am so ready to meet you. And to see your daddy with you. And to have you here with family. You are so, so, so, loved already. Mommy is more than happy to share her birthday with you. Or have you as an early bday present [hint hint]. Stay safe and know we are beyond thankful for you!


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