TBB Asks: Relationship Edition

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A week late, oh well. Valentine's day is this week so I'm fine. It's fine.

1] Who is your oldest friend and how did you meet? My bestie, L. She and I met in kindergarten when both of our father's were stationed at the same base in California. We were not best friends then. We actually were very competitive when we first met. My family moved to DC and her family moved to Japan and we didn't see each other until 4th grade when they stayed with us for a week after moving back to the states. It was besties from then on.

2] Tell us about your circle of support. Who are your people? I'm lucky because I have so many wonderful people in my circle. My sisters, first. Then my besties. Then my fitness besties. Then my kickball besties. I have so so so many fabulous women who support me and want nothing but the best for me. When you find them, hold on tight.

3] How did you meet your partner? Kickball. Yes, kickball. We met on a social league and the rest is history.

4] How is Valentine's day celebrated in your home? My parents always did an amazing job of celebrating Valentine's day for us when we grew up. The sissy's and I always had balloons, candy and fun lil trinkets. I never was a big fan of the pomp & circumstance of V-day when dating. I never was the girl who put pressure on the guy and never freaked out if we didn't do anything big. The day never defined a relationship, ever. With Le Husband we will sometimes cook a special dinner and usually exchange a card.

5] What is your love language? Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch.

6] Do you prefer receiving flowers or chocolates? Flowers, please. Chocolates just go to waste :)!

7] What is the most meaningful gift you have ever received? Roses from Le Husband after we found out I was pregnant. It was so unexpected and so sweet. Two close seconds were clothes from friends unexpectedly, when I was going through a really tough time last year. They both sold clothing and just sent me a lil something and it made my day.

This or That

A big trend around the Instagram world right now is answering polls in Instastories. I  have yet to actually do one myself, but thought a collection of a few would be a fun post. Admittedly I'm a bad blogger because I don't remember WHO posted all of the questions, so I apologize here for not citing the correct source. Please feel free to play along :)!!!

FALL // SPRING

SUMMER // WINTER

SKYDIVING // SCUBADIVING

CANDY // CHOCOLATE

IPHONE // ANDROID

STAY UP LATE // WAKE UP EARLY AFTERNOON

INSTASTORY // SNAPCHAT SOTRY

MINI GOLF // BOWLING

CARIDO // WEIGHTS

CALLING // TEXTING

POP // ROCK 

OCEAN // POOL

BURRITO // TACO

COUCH // RECLINER

CAR // TRUCK

BOOK // TV

SALTY // SWEET

CITY // COUNTRY

MOUNTAINS // OCEAN

 COOK // CLEAN

BATH // SHOWER

BIG SPOON // LITTLE SPOON

For the Record

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For the record...

... even though I'm a champagne girl, I LOVE me a good glass of whiskey on the rocks.

... now that our renovations are super close to being finished I feel kind of like a baby for whining. #kindof

... I'll pick chocolate for dessert 99.9% of the time. Only time I'll switch is for a KILLER authentic creme brûlée. 

... being in the dark outside and in a big house still scares me. #runupthestairsatnight

... military/police television shows are two of my favorite genres to watch. #sealteam

... however wartime movies make me cry too much and I can't handle them very well. 

... ebooks are my favorite to use when I travel, however physical books are my favorite way to read. 

... I wanted to have five kids and expected to have at least four by now. 

... if I get less than six hours of sleep my body is completely out of wak and it takes me days to recover. 

... Le Husband and I did not discuss bodily functions until our third year of marriage. 

... I am extremely ticklish and scare easily. But, I have a pretty on point 'spidey sense' making it tough to sneak up on me.

What do you share 'for the record'?

Putting Down the Bricks

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I'm good at holding grudges. I'm also not shy about telling people how good I am at holding onto things. I can and I will. If someone did you wrong and you need someone on your team, giiiirl I'm there. I'm there taking them down, I'm there reminding you how much better you are without them, I'm there to support you through everything. And if you move on, I'm there for you too, but I've always got that HURT in my head and won't move on completely.

It's the same with people who have wronged me. Oh I'm goooooooood at holding on and remembering why I don't want someone in my life anymore. Or what I would do if they ever talked to me again. I'll forgive, but I won't forget. That hurt, that issue? It sits and stays. And is ready to be called up at any moment.

Which is tiring. And heavy. All those bricks. All those moments in the past I still hold on to because I carry the grudge. What good is it doing me? How is it helping me live a happy life? Easy answer, it's not. I heard a sermon on Sunday where the pastor compared grudges to bricks at the bottom of a pool. How one brick, one problem, one grudge you can manage as you kick back up to the surface. But as you add on grievances and grudges, the heavier the load and harder it is to swim to the surface. The surface is oxygen and happiness and the bottom of the pool is not.

In the past 34 years I've learned a great deal. One of the things I'm learning late in life is to LET.IT.GO. Holding grudges does nothing for the offender, it just continues to poison my life. Take up brain and emotional space I could use for greater, more important things. Happier things for a happier life. So here are the bricks I'm laying down:

To the college boyfriend who chose his fraternity and senior year escapades over me. Who tried to make it work again but couldn't abide by my terms. Who truly did a number on me with regards to opening my heart and trusting men. Who almost ruined my senior year in college. Who never could get over the fact I made the soccer team and he didn't get asked to play. I'm putting down the brick.

To the best friend in college who fooled everyone. Who decided to lie, cheat and steal. Who 'supported me' unless it conflicted with her playing time. Who always tried to talk me into making wrong decisions. Who was a master at manipulation and would never talk honestly about problems. Who chose to keep everyone in the dark to live a double life. I'm putting down the brick.

To the ex-best friend who let her jealousy ruin our decade old relationship. Who constantly tried to push me down a different path than the one I wanted. Who couldn't stand the thought of me being married before her. Who decided one day she no longer wanted to be happy for me and tried to make people choose between us. I'm putting down the brick.

To the trolls on sports teams who enjoy riling everyone up because they can. The ones who decide to post stupid things online, say untrue things about people's character and accuse others of cheating. Who drive me crazy because they know just what to say to push my buttons. I'm putting down the brick.

To the person I cut out of my life four years ago who continues to try and stir up drama. Who's need for constant pump ups and dramatics became too exhaustive for me and who tried to lie about everything after I ended the friendship. You're big and bad behind a computer screen as you continue to rehash the past. Which used to annoy me because it's different from the who you really are in the world, but once again, I'm moving on with my life. I'm putting down the brick

To the extended family members who continue to try my patiences being rude to others I love. You can't choose family and sometimes things get heated and words get said that can never be unheard. I wish we could all get along. I'm putting down the brick.

My shoulders are so much lighter after writing this here. I'm sure I'll still hold a grudge and feel heavy again, but I'm actively trying to change my mentality. Nothing changes overnight, but a single step is where success starts.

Now, please understand. This is not some post to say forgive and forget anything and everything. I don't pretend to know everyone's situation or struggles. As you just read, most of the bricks I carry are quite small compared to many of the world's problems. Which is why I need to set them down.

This post is mostly for me. To finally say the words out loud, to truly get it out of my head and here. And maybe, this post might help someone else put down the brick(s). Maybe lighten someone else's load. What brick do you need to put down?

What's New With You {October}

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Late to the party, womp womp. But, at least I'm still at the party, right?

New things in my hood:

+ Now a certified personal trainer (CPT) after failing the exam in June. WOOOOHOOO

+ Starting the trainer training (haha) and excited/nervous to learn everything.

+ Babysissy is coming to visit me this weekend while Le Husband is out of town. I was green with envy he was going to be in Las Vegas without me, but now sissy will be here I think I got the better end of the deal. #familyalways

+ Sportyspice might be getting a puppy, eeeeek.

+ Bummer of a new is my knee. Or IT band. Or ligament. Just SOMETHING along the outer part of my right knee is bothering me, especially after I teach. I'm on an icing and stretching regiment per a PT friend, but uggggh, y'all, just ugh!!!!

+ Oh and yeah, did I mention LAUNCH IS NEXT WEEK!?!?!? EGAD!

+ I've slowly brought my other blog out of the spiderwebs. Please stop by if you have the chance and let me know your honest thoughts. What would you like to read/see from a new fitness blog?

+ My tribe of women friends is growing here and I'm beyond grateful. There are some amazing women who are fitness instructors and are friends of fitness instructors and I've enjoyed getting to know each and every person. So thankful to slowly have my tribe form.

+ October brings beautiful days and I find myself praising the beauty of the world every morning.

Alright, thats all she wrote. Nothing spectacular or pretty with pictures, but these are the new things happening in my life at the moment. I'm trying to get better about being here more often, so please keep checking back. Join me tomorrow for Weekly Wins :)!

Three Lil things

I've seen this lil quiz post circulating in blogland and finally put down my answers. How many can you guess?

Three favorite of my favorite foods

soft serve ice cream cone

sweet potato fries

sushi

Three things I'd never give up

food

chapstick

teaching group fitness

Three favorite cocktails

champagne

bellini

wine

Three favorite movies

UP

Home Alone

The Negotiator

Three favorite simple pleasures in life

warm clean sheets out of the dryer

first sip of coffee on a quiet weekend morning

le husband's hand on my leg while we chill on the couch

Three things always in my car

a knife

chapstick

lotion

Three things I always have on me

phone

chapstick

nail clipper

Three things I regret not doing/doing

not cutting someone out of my life earlier

not pursuing sports broadcasting with more ambition

wasting time on stupid moments that don't matter

Three most recent places I've traveled

Virginia

Ohio

Florida

Three most often used makeup products

tarte shape tape

mascara

eye liner

Three things that make me cry

remembering my maternal grandmother and thinking about how she wasn't at my wedding

sports moments

being away from my family

Three things that make me smile/laugh

hanging with my sisters

le husband's laugh

corny jokes

Three places I want to visit inside the US

Montana

Napa

Maine

Three places I want to visit outside the US

Ireland

Bora Bora

Germany

Three blessings in my life

family

husband

health

What You Don't See

Mount Denali circa 2014 [a view rarely seen by visitors because of weather]

Hello! Stop whatever you're doing [yes, even reading my blog] and go read THIS piece by my girl, Alyssa [I'll wait]. Done, so good right? Oh, I guess I better clarify, she's not MY girl, but she's someone who tells it like it is and has a fantastic way of inspiring me with her writing. Not only is it 100% grammatically correct - something I'm working on - {Did I even do that right?} her words seem to flow together so easily and all of a sudden I've read six blog posts in a snap. Talent my friends, talent.

Her most recent post broke down something I've had simmering in my head. There are many posts I've read recently and wondered 'what is really going on' or 'is that the real truth?' because it just felt too perfect. Too crafted. Too too, if you will. And then I wondered, 'what do people think about my blog'? Granted, this blog has been neglected and changed a lot in the past year due to life, but back when I was blogging more and sharing more with y'all did it seem authentic? Also, where is the balance in what you share and what you don't share? How much is too much? How much makes someone say 'you know it's out there forever right'? I like to think I keep a good line between real life and not too much. I plan to keep things the same going forward, but today I'm sharing a little bit more than normal. The things you don't see when you read here. The things normally kept just for me in real life.

|| the frustrated moments when i'm a complete mess, crying through my fears and my husband just looks at me. this makes me even madder because all i want is female support but, duh, he's not a female.

|| coinciding with the above, you rarely read about our fights/stresses because i'm one who keeps that off the blog. doesn't mean it doesn't happen, i just choose not to share it. we've had more than normal this year and they have been doozies to say the least. those tough moments of being ugly i keep to myself for the most part.

|| how unhappy i am where my work life has landed. yes, that makes me sound ungrateful so i don't share much here. where i was before was so much worse, so much harder and so much stress but here, now. this place is so unfulfilling and so backwards from where i was in virgina.

|| the tons of pictures i take for fitness stuff and never post. i want so badly to venture into the online fitness world, into a new blog all about fitness and an instagram account for people to use as inspiration. but, i get scared and don't share anything because really, with everything already out there where and how would i stand out?

|| how badly i procrastinate. i'm one of the worst out there, trust me. i wait until the last minute and am one of those who end up paying penalties because things are late. not all the time, but still, often enough. i book flights late. i wait to study or learn things late. i put off asking the hard questions and 90% of the time laziness is the main culprit.

|| our messy, dysfunctional house. we've lived here six months plus and still have things helter skelter. one room, our only other bedroom, is a disaster catch all for the things we don't have a place for yet. i know many a friend who moved with children and had their home settled in two weeks. us? yeah, we just can't seem to get it all together at once.

|| the research I've started to find a therapist. wow. i said it. here. the move away and the stress of everything the past year has brought to life some anxiety and depression i had no idea i held inside. part of my doesn't share this because, my business, but the other part doesn't share because i feel a judgement for being over dramatic.

|| how much i stress and worry about being a good instructor. and how much drama the instructor world holds. it is more work than anyone realizes and it can be tough when people get nasty.

|| the small quiet moments of love and joy. i used to try and share them, with a quick picture and note, but that seemed to taint the moment. now i just enjoy them. with le husband, with friends, with family or just on my own. living my moments means not sharing them here all the time.

Alive and Recovery

Hello, sweet friends, hello. I am alive, well and recovering from my gallbladder surgery on Thursday. Thank you so much for all the prayers, kind words on last week's post, well wishes and good vibes.

Surgery day went smoothly, my gallbladder was more inflamed than expected so surgery was a bit longer than originally thought, but the surgeon did an incredible job. I have four scars on my belly now and the belly button incision is the one causing the most pain, if you will.

Honestly, my recovering is going slower than I would like [imagine that] and I've been in a bit more pain than I expected. Other people have stated how EASY this surgery was for them so I expected it to be even easier for me. Well, wouldn't you know that hasn't been the case? Friday and Saturday I was extremely slow, tired and needed help standing and sitting. I went for a pedicure and lunch with my Mama and aunt, which was a blast, but I was wiped out when it was all over and done.

Lots of laying on the couch resting, not a lot of getting things done. Which I'm learning to be okay with right now. I mean, I lost an organ. OF MY BODY! It is gone! No longer functioning, so now my body is healing and learning how to function without it. Trying to do too much is not going to help me heal faster and I need to not worry about how other people have recovered. My story, my journey.

I'm hoping to get back to the gym in the next few days. FOR EASY workouts, don't worry. Walking the treadmill or moving slowly on the elliptical. No lifting until next week for sure.

Again, thank you for the support. I was unbealievely scared about going under anesthesia and worried about having surgery away from my squad back home. But, God provided support with y'all, with Facebook, with Instagram and with friends who have become family down here. Friends who checked in on me constantly and friends who visited. I am a blessed woman and thankful, so unbelievably thankful.

I wish you the best week, loves <3 

Ten Things I Suck At

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Math. I hate it. It hates me. Perfect relationship. Calculators are my best friends.

Holding the snark when someone wrongs me. The B comes out and she's a nasty one.

Drinking alcohol. Used be AWESOME and could keep up with most. Now, two drinks and I'm toast.

Saying the word brewery. Can't do it unless I say it super slow.

Letting go. One day it will happen. One day.

Saying no. Somehow it often turns into the word yes.

Keeping still when music is playing. I can't stop the feet, I must move to the beat.

Sleeping. Takes me awhile to fall asleep and I constantly wake up during the night. Woof.

Not being the best athletically. I hate when someone is better than me at anything athletic, minus professional athletes. I want to be the best, always.

Granting patience to those closest to me. Too often they receive the least amount of my patience which is wrong on so many different levels. Truly trying to change this about myself.

Borrowed from *here*

What I'm Up To {April}

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What We're Eating... random, random, random. Lots of lean protein, lots of gnocchi [because easy], lots of homemade tortilla/pita chips, lots of protein shakes.

What I'm reminiscing about... Europe. Sweet, beautiful Europe. This day last year we were traveling around Italy in Cinque Terre and my soul gets so sad remembering how beautiful of a life we had for a month. I still haven't fully recapped [I WILL, one day] and I so miss the carefree attitude we walked around with and I miss the glorious views and the delicious food. I made Le Husband promise we would go back someday.

What I'm Loving... not living for my phone. I've only been at my new job for three weeks, but not having to worry about my phone ringing all the time is the biggest blessing. Beyond thankful for the new job.

What We've Been Up To... where to start. Le Husband is now working back at his old job and doing a lot of traveling. I'm teaching four classes a week on top of my new job and starting to add 6am workouts to my fitness regimen. Now that I no longer live at the gym {PTL} mornings are the only times free for me to get MY workouts done. It's been tough, but it's what I have to do to stay in shape and get better for my class participants.

What I'm Dreading... surgery. UGH!

What I'm Working On... my PT certification. Oops, let this one fall waaaaaay off the radar and have to take the test next month. Holy frijoles, need to get my act together quick.

What I'm Excited About... being about to eat FATTY foods. I've been eating EXTREMELY lean because fatty foods cause me to have a gallbladder attack. Great for my body composition, but I miss cheese, half/half, olive oil, yogurt, burgers, avocados cheese, ice cream and did I mention cheese?

What I'm Watching/Reading... not much on television, I don't have time. I'm mostly watching videos for Les Mills releases and reading my notes. I need to get better about a devotional at the end of the day.

What I'm Listening To... BODYPUMP, BODYATTACK, BODYCOMBAT, BARRE and SPRINT music.

What I'm Wearing... REAL CLOTHES! So exciting after living in black pants and a black polo the past six months. Bringing out the leggings, long shirts, jeans and cute tops. Oh and of course, all the Reebok workout clothes.

What I'm Doing This Weekend... more house stuff. We will be traveling a lot in the summer so lots and lots to get done in the townhouse while we have the time. Oh and I think we have a kickball tournament?

What I'm Looking Forward to Next Month... seeing my mama, even if it is for surgery. Traveling for kickball and seeing friends. Memorial weekend and the opening of our HOA POOL! Yes, we have a pool.

What Else Is New... gosh, seems like so much is new still.

Sorry for the lack of pictures, I know it's not as fun. But, I'm just getting back into my blog groove so posting three days in a row is big time, haha. Thanks for reading!

linking up here

Three Things

Hilarious, right? My BOFF sent this to me last week and I must say it is the PERFECT interpretation of how I feel about teaching BARRE this morning. I've done my best to put together a great program and we will have to see how it goes. Send a lil extra grace my way today, please?

Moving on to back to back post days, what? I saw this on Steph's blog yesterday and thought, yay for a post idea.  Just a quick lil q&a that gives you a lil bit more about me. Thanks, lady!

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Three things I'd never give up: freedom, family, sports.

Three favorite vegetables: baby carrots, asparagus, green beans.

Three shows I watched faithfully from the beginning to end: The Good Wife, Castle, Army Wives

Three places I want to visit inside the US: Hawaii, NORAD, Cape Cod

There places I want visit outside the US: Fiji/Bora Bora, Australia, Germany

Three things I always have on me: chapstick, lotion, nail clippers

Three things that are always in my car: lotion, dental floss, napkins

Three most recent phone calls were to/from: Le Husband, Sportyspice, Gold's Gym

Three most often used makeup products: mascara, lip gloss, Naked3 palette

Three things that make me laugh: corny jokes, baby giggles, my sisters

Three things that make me cry: sports stories, world suffering, cutting onions

Three of my most overused phrases/words: awesome, so exciting, byeeEEEEEEE

When I'm All Alone

I'm not the happiest camper. I don't mind evenings without Le Husband every now and then. Whenever he traveled each month I used the time to get extra catch up time with my girls and my trashy shows, haha. While I enjoy a bit of ME time here and there, I'm an extrovert by nature so being around people is my happy place. 

As you can imagine a weekend when I'm all alone is not my favorite.  Le Husband spent the weekend with friends in Denver and my extended family headed to North Carolina for a wedding and beach trip early Saturday morning. So this weekend it was just me myself and I. In Tennessee.  With none of my gaggle of friends or family. I know there are many women [especially mamas] out there who would relish a weekend alone, however without my normal home base I felt a lil bit lonely. Clearly with everything going on in the world being lonely is peanuts, but this blog is my reality. 

This weekend alone I...

... spent evenings sitting on the deck watching the sun set.

... spent Saturday morning subbing a BODYPUMP class at a new gym.

... did another thirty minutes swimming and stretching. Time in the gym was time away from an empty house. 

... listened to multiple podcasts of MY FAVORITE MURDER which is my NEW FAVORITE podcast.

... caught up on my silly reality television shows while vegging on the couch when it rained. 

... scheduled a massage for Monday because my five BODYPUMP classes last week were killer.

... cleaned up our room and reorganized things. 

... watch a live kickball stream on the porch. #checkoutthesunset

... slept way better than expected in an empty home that isn't mine. 

... woke up bright and early to try out two new churches in the area. 

... came home changed into my bathing suit and headed down to the lake. 

... went on a ninety minute SUP excursion and dodge many a boat on the water. #everyonewasouttoplay

... attempted, rocked and DOCUMENTED the headstand on a SUP. #yesifellonce

... listened to more podcasts while doing chores around the house. 

... ate sushi and binged on Disney movies for dinner. OH EM GEE Home Alone 2 came on afterwards and I was soooooo stinking excited. It's almost CHRISTMAS IN JULY, friends!

... ate my token ice cream and snapped the token picture for National Ice Cream day. #sogood!

... prepped this post [GO ME], did some reading then headed to bed. 

I think for my first weekend all alone in a new city I did pretty well. I hope next time to have a group of friends to call or a some girl dinner dates scheduled. Looking forward to finding my squad down here for sure. I'm picking Le Husband today after my massage and before my last minute BODYPUMP sub request. I hope everyone has a great start to the week!

Today We're Getting Real Honest about Fitness & Weight {Real Talk}

How many times have y'all seen a headline like the one above? How many times have you written one yourself? I took a cursory look through my blog [using the Weight tagline] and I personally have around 20 or so posts dealing with my body image and fitness level. Some are recounting HIGHS [Whole30, the Spartan and BODYPUMP] while other posts detail how unhappy I feel in my skin and how much I wish I could change my body.

Honest truth and reason for this post… I'm the heaviest I've EVER been in my life and right now I am trying to figure out how to shed the extra 9 pounds I picked up while gallivanting through Europe and moving to a new state. My discipline was nothing while in Europe [more on that later] and I also struggled with eating healthy while at my parent's home and even here in Tennessee. I'm not happy for multiple reasons; my clothes don't' fit right, I'm out of shape, it's bathing suit season at the lake and I just feel blah.

I know what I need to do to get back to where I was before I left. I, like many people, just wish it was a bit easier. Le Husband and I ate our way through Europe and I can honestly say I only regret four meals/snacks over the entire trip. I drank two Cokes I really didn't need [nor did I enjoy], the pomme frites in Paris/Versailles were a lil over the top and a nutella breakfast muffin was a complete disappointment while in the Milan trains station. Other than those few blahs, everything else we ate was delicious and PART of our journey. We ate and drank what we wanted because we knew food was such an important part of the cultural experience. A bazillion delicious croissants while in France, lots of pasta and pizza in Italy and of course, all the gelato EVERYWHERE. Don't get me wrong, I'm not upset about the delicious food I indulged in, I wouldn't change anything about our trip. We worked out when we could [thank you TRX and cruise gym] and we walked close to 200 miles seeing all the sights. It is what is and I'm okay with they why, just not the what.

Originally I anticipating a quick jump back into healthy eating when we finally made it home. However, our first two nights home were spent eating out with dear friends and the food at each place was amazingly delicious, just not healthy in the least. Le Husband left to visit his family a few days after we arrived home so I figured 'hey, I can just do meals for one, no big deal'.  But then all the texts and calls came pouring in and suddenly I was eating out four days a week for dinner, plus buying meals for lunch because I hadn't been to the store to buy my normal healthy meals. And then of COURSE there was all the celebratory cake and drinks at work.

Home life was not any easier, mostly because I let myself get lazy and just ate what my parent's ate. Not that they eat poorly or unhealthy, they just eat differently than I do now and I know what works for my body and I failed to prep or plan. The same situation has happened down here in Tennessee. Le Husband and I are trying to mold into my aunt and uncle's routine but it's not quite ours so things food wise are still off. We've had delicious cookout meals, fish tacos, and fajitas but all of the meals have been accompanied by a glass of wine, margaritas or extra food stuff we normally never have in the house. I mean how do you say no to homemade peach cobbler after you helped slice the peaches?

But today marks the spark of change. Today I'm documenting my next fitness journey. I've taken measurements, stood on the scale [barf] and began planning my attack. It is not going to be easy, it is not going to be fun and it is not something I'm honestly looking forward to doing. I will start saying no to things I know won't help me reach my goal and start revamping my workout routine. Now that I'm teaching BODYPUMP twice a week [give or take] I need to invest in my strength training so I can lead by example. My first class back from the trip was a huge wake up call and now that I have the tools at my disposal it's time to start taking action.

My new routine will consist of running, strength training, swimming [in a pool or the lake] and of course a lil bit of water skiing, too. If I get my act together I'll document my work outs to share [if that's of any interest to anyone] or just to have for myself. I'm also currently studying for my AFAA license so I think tracking food and workouts will be helpful if I ever want to take the next step in training.

Props to you if you've made it through the whole post, I know it was quite wordy and honestly it a was mostly for me to put out in this public forum for accountability. Hopefully by the fourth of July I'll have some results to share and I'll be feeling better about myself.

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Smile, it's almost Friday. Have a wonderful day, friends! < 3

Disney Tag You're Favorites

I saw this post on Emily's blog awhile ago and had it sitting in my drafts for way too long. Figured today would be a great day to share a lil more about me and my love of Disney! #betsomeofmyanswerswillsurpriseyou

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Favorite Disney film: There are soooo many, mostly princess movies, but hands down UP. It's my family's FAVORITE, we quote it ALLL the time and any time I see it on TV I watch it. SQUIRREL!

Favorite Disney Characters: How long do you want to be here?

Favorite Disney Princess: When I was younger Sleeping Beauty because I thought she was the MOST beautiful princess in the world. Now I think I'd like a lil bit of a mix of Sleeping Beauty, Merida, Mulan and Jasmine.

Favorite Disney Sidekick: Mushu from Mulan. He is fabulously hilarious and wildy witty. "Get the bags cricket, let's move it heifer"; "It's porridge and it's happy to see you"; "Did you see those guys, they popped out of the snow, like daisies"!

Favorite Disney Song: Oh man, I can't pick, I seriously love to sing them alllllll!

Which Disney character would be your best friend? Merida. Tomboy princess, hellllllo PINKY!

Who would be your Disney pet? Gus-Gus, I mean he's just so cuuuuuuuuuuuute!

Have you ever been to Disneyland? Yes, twice but the first time doesn't count. My parents packed all three kids up in the car when I was maybe four and drove us from Montery to Disneyland and wouldn't you know, the park was closed unexpectedly. CAN.YOU.IMAGINE!?! No Internet or Apps to check on, just drive up to the park to find it closed. My poor, poor parents. We went later that summer though, phew!

You is your favorite Disney Villain? BOOOO on all the villains, they are the worst. I have to pick two Scar from the Lion King and Goob from Meet the Robinsons.

Do you collect anything special? No, not really. We used to collect the VHS [haha] and DVDs but now it's only if we LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE the movie. Can't wait to snatch the ones we have at my parent's house when kids start making their appearance.

What Disney film would you star in if you could? Meet the Robinsons so I could use my inventions to jump into ALL the other Disney movies. But for real, I think I would like to star in the Princess and the Frog, LOVE NOLA and the music and dancing in the movie is my favorite.

How old were you when you watched your first Disney Movie? I believe three of four. My parents took me to see Snow White when it was relaunched in theaters. I'm sure I was a model child.

Who is your favorite Disney couple? Karl and Ellie. I know we don't get a lot of time with them but they just seem to be the sweetest couple in the world and I love the love they share with each other.

Have you done this Disney tag? Who are some of your favorites?

21 Questions

I saw this on Nikki's blog awhile back and thought it would be a PERFECT lil post while I am away. I personally LOVE learning more about my blog friends and hope you enjoy learning more about me.

1. Are you named after anyone? Yes, I feel honored to be my father's namesake. #nonotpinky

2. When was the last time you cried? Oh goodness, last night after birthday dinner. So many changes are coming my way and the enormity of everything hit me like a brick wall.

3. Do you have kids? Nope, but God willing possibly next year, eeek! #didijustwritethat

4. If you were another person, would you be a friend of yourself? Le duh, I'm awesome. No seriously, I think I exuded a warm personality and believe myself to be extremely supportive and fun. Let me know if you think otherwise.

5. Do you use sarcasm a lot? NAH D'OH!!!!! Sarcasm is my third foreign language.

6. Will you ever bungee jump? If the opportunity arose I wouldn't say no, but I won't seek the opportunity out myself.

7. What is your favorite cereal? This is tough so here are my top three: Lucky Charms, Frosted Flakes, Life.

8. What's the first thing you notice about people? Eyes and figure... are you in better shape than me ;)?

9.  What is your eye color? Hazel/Green. I love that they change with my clothing.

10. Scary movie or happy ending? Have you met me? Happy ending ONLY ALL THE TIME!

11. Favorite smells? Vanilla, evergreens, sugar cookies, jasmine,

12. Computer or television? I'm gonna computer because you can watch shows on it and play on the interwebs.

13. What's the furthest you've been from home? In high school my father was stationed in South Korea for a year and we visited him for two weeks in the summer. Despite the circumstances it was one of the most amazing trips.

14. Do you have any special talents? I don't think anything special.

15. Where were you born? The GREAT state of Texas.

16. What are your hobbies? Sports, lifting, teaching BODYPUMP, cooking, baking, eating [nom nom nom], sewing [doing a lil crossstich what what], reading, writing, blogging and of course, KICKBALL!

17. Summer or winter? SUMMA, SUMMA, SUMMATIIIIIIIIIIME! All the time, errrreeeeytime.

18. Do you have any pets? Not now, but had two dogs growing up and a gerbil.

19. Favorite movie? Can't pick one so here are my top six Frequency, UP [and anything Disney or Pixar], The Negotiator, Enemy of the State, League of Their Own, Field of Dreams.

20. Do you have any siblings? Yes, two fabulous lil sissys who are my bestest friends.

21. What do you want to be when you grow up? Good night moon, this has changed so many times. When I was younger I wanted to be the President, a veterinarian and a ballerina all at once. Hmmm, how many of those did I check off? Yeah, about that, haha. Anyway now? I honestly would LOVE to work in the fitness industry. My dream job, as of this moment, would be gaining the knowledge and expertise to work for Les Mills as an elite instructor so I could lead Quarterly's and Releases. That and I'd love to work in a bakery!

The Last

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Thing I ate... hard boiled eggs for breakfast. Got to be lean for Europe.

Thing I watched... throwback of DCC Making the Team. Needed something light and easy while I packed up my room and suitcase. Cheers to having access to all the seasons on line [insert hair flip here].

Account I followed on Instagram... tonycavalero. He's a high school friend of mine who is an actor and been on Heart of Dixie [Stanley], Splitting Adam and is now the star of the Nickelodeon series, School of Rock. I'm so thrilled he's making it out in Hollywood, he's such a great guy and HILARIOUS.
 
Blog I visited... Perception is Everything. My sweet friend and best buddy, Janna is back y'all!
 
Activity I did... drove into work. BOO, boring. But it's my last two days before vacation, whoop1

Song I listened to... Lips Like Sugar for an old BODYPUMP track. Gotta learn more chorey over the trip.

Person I talked to... Mama B on my drive into work. A lil ray of sunshine and BURST of energy in the morning.

Time I swore... last night when box started to fall so I jumped to keep it up and hit my toes on another box right in front of it. Yeah, hurt like the dickens so a few four letter words escaped my lips.

Product I used... hairspray to keep my locks nice and curly for BIRTHDAY DINNER!

Book I read... ummm yeah, book reading has been off the table most of April. I'm currently reading 'The Way of the Seal' because I want to learn to be better mentally. Most self improvement books don't resonate with me, but I have nothing but awe and respect for Seals so this book am really connecting to the mission statement in the book.
 
Thing that frustrated me... trying to figure out all the different airline carry on policies. We are flying budget airlines and they are all different in their terminology of a carry on, personal item or luggage weight. 

Time Le Husband shocked me... I found the corsage from our wedding day saved in a special place when we were cleaning out the office. He's not really a sentimental guy so seeing he kept that made me smile big.

*written on 4/12

partonehere parttwohere

If The Worst Were to Happen {Getting Real Here Today}

If you're looking for a happy post, click the lil red x right now. Today I'm getting heavy and that might not be the head space you're in right now. No worries, no hard feelings, I'll catch ya later.

Today I'm talking about death and dying. Not the normal Pinky topic right? And I'm talking about if the worst were to happen to me. YIKES! Again, probably not what you would expect while I'm gone on vacation, however this is a topic that has been weighing heavily on my mind since we decided to take our long vacation.

Death scares the crap out of me. Even though I am a Christian and believe in Heaven and seeing my God when I leave this world the concept flat out freaks me out. I can't think about it too much at one time because it is just too much for my brain [which is why this post was written in installments]. I've always had a hard time when people die because it hurts me so much that they are gone from here. I can't touch them, talk to them, see them or smell them. They are all in my heart and memories but no longer tangible. So we comfort ourselves saying 'They are no longer in pain. They are in a better place. They would want us to be happy', which is probably true. However, we will never KNOW unless they left us something to go off of when they leave.

I vividly remember reading a story in the newspaper when I was 12 about a young girl my age killed in a freak car accident. The sadness over a life cut short wasn't what stayed with me, but the fact this girl had written a letter a few months before to her family in the event something tragic happened to her. I was floored she had the wherewithal to put a pen to paper for her family and I knew I wanted to do the same thing. So I scrounged around for some stationary and spent over an hour writing this letter to my family 'just in case'. And then I hide it somewhere I can't remember because I didn't want anyone to find it while I was still alive. I didn't want people to think I was morbid or weird. Which some of you might be thinking right now, which is 100% okay, I'm totally weird.

With the bombings in Paris, Turkey and Brussels my concern for our well being has grown and let's not even talk about my fear of flying combined with my fear of non US carriers. Our trip has us on seven flights which is seven time of almost debilitating fear in the air. This is something I am working on, it's just taking a lot of time to get to a point where take off doesn't cause my face to go white. But, I digress. I am excited to experience a new country and learn new things however I also know the world we live in is no longer as safe as we think. Sometimes people are just in the wrong city at the wrong time as terrorism continues to spread.  While it's scary to talk about and imagine, doesn't me we should take steps to prepare for the worst.

I spoke with the BOFF and Babyspice about POA and living wills, however we weren't able to find someone who could see us on such short notice [ooops]. I downloaded a springing POA though and gave it signed to Babyspice. You might shudder with my lack of buttoned up business, however our families [Le Husband's and mine] are close enough that I am 100% confident everything would be split as it should.

But the assets and physical things are not what trouble me, rather the emotional burden we assume when those we love leave us. I do not want those left behind to question anything emotional. I know I am loved and I know they know I love them. To ensure there are no questions, I've written my family a note which I will give to my father with instructions not to open. When we get back safe and sound I'll take it back and burn it because it will no longer be relevant.

If the worst were to happen...

... I would want my family to know how much I loved them and how much fun our family is together.

... My hope would be that they would not grieve too long, but remember with joy the time we had together [easier said than done, I know. Pretty sure I would lose my job for not showing up if the roles were reversed].

... I'd want a big party after my funeral. With dancing music, champagne flowing and jokes about me being stupid. There is a time to grieve and be sad, but my personality is sooooo much about fun that I would hate people sitting around being sad for an extended period of time.

... I would want my name to be spoken without weight and sadness. I would want it to be spoken like effervescent bubbles in a bottle of champagne. There

... my wish for all friends and family is to know each and every single person made an impact on my life and I am grateful to everyone for all the lessons, good and bad, learned along the way. .

... I would want everyone to know that I will keep loving them and being with them like the waves in the ocean.

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Do you have a will? Do you have a note written somewhere if the worst were to happen? Have you ever thought about what you would say? Am I the crazy bird up here in blog land?

Thirty Two Was, Thrirty Three Will Be

Thirty Two was...

... another year of big muscles and lifting heavy.

... finally figuring out what diet lifestyle works for my body. WHOLE30 has been a game changer and I will forever sing praises of the lifestyle change it can make for everyone. You can do it, trust me.

... joining a new kickball team and worrying we made a mistake initially, but realizing it was the best decision.

... enjoying one last kickball hurrah with Le Husband and the sissys.

... stepping out of my comfort zone and trying something new with BODYPUMP training.

... studying and practicing constantly to become a CERTIFIED BODYPUMP instructor.

... getting a job teaching at my home gym.

... freaking out but learning how to teach and make each class better.

... setting a fitness goal and knocking it out of the park.

... nurturing old blog friendships while also watching new friendship blossoms.

... making a HUGE decisions about our life and finally putting words into action.

... saying goodbye to my home of 10 years and being close to family and friends.

... my last soccer game with my indoor team. #sevenyears

... a year of learning how to grant more grace and to let go of grudges. #workinprogress

... my middle sister's engagement.

... the start of our European ADVENTURE!

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Thirty Three will hopefully be...

... the most amazing trip of a life time with my husband.

... filled with new adventures in the USA and maybe more abroad.

... a year of realization, growth and inspiration.

... when I pass my AFAA certification and also get certified in another Les Mills class.

... the year I master layer two and layer three coaching in BODYPUMP.

... another year of eating a modified WHOLE30 program to keep my body fuctioning well and strong.

... the year we decide to start a family. #OHEMGEEEEEEE

... full of fun new memories with new friends in a new city.

... a fabulous time celebrating Sportyspice's wedding.

... the year we find our FOREVER home.

... the age I finally learn to let go of resentment and bad thoughts when people piss me off.

... finding a balance between creating  new friendships in my new home and nurturing those I left behind.

... a big step forward for this blog and the future.

A Happy Birthday and A Goodbye

Today I say HELLO to 33, Goodbye to 32, spend our last night in our apartment, leave my job for a month and start saying goodbye to my life here in the NOVA area. Talk about a serious FIVE on Friday right? #turtleserious

I LOVE birthday celebrations: Holy crappers I'm 33, what in the world?!? I'm sitting here in shock as I type out the number thirty-three. THIRTYFLIPPINGTHREE! My college self had me done with kids by now, haha, lil off there sistah. If you've been reading here for over a year you know that I'm a huge birthdayaholic, for me and for others, but this year the birthday is a lil turned down [for what?]. Oh and of course, shout out to my birthday twin!

Tonight We Say Goodbye to Apartment #13: After ten years [almost to the month] I say goodbye to my complex and lucky #13. I originally moved into this  SAME apartment a year out of college and then moved into a one bedroom within the same complex seven years later. We are moving on to bigger and better things, but this was my first big girl home and then was the first home I lived in with my Husband. SO many wonderful memories made here and I will always treasure this two bedroom in Arlington. #thankyouforeverything #gonnamissyouandgonnamisstapseverynight

The Packing Never Ends: After a week plus of big time packing we STILL have boxes to pack, load into the van and drive to storage and we also have boxes to take to my parent's house too. Last night we were up until 1am doing work and loading up the car, but I'm not complaining. I'd rather have less to do, today. Oh, have I mentioned I still need to do another test run of packing my carry on? Yeah, fun packing times.

Last BODYPUMP class: Yup, last night I taught my LAST BODYPUMP class for four weeks, crazy town. It was my first time teaching 97 solo and minus one oops I'm pretty sure I rocked. My class did so well and I was super proud of their success and workout. I'll hopefully be able to teach a class or two when I get back from Europe but who knows once I get to Tennessee. It will be nice to have a lil break but I'm kind of sad since this was my FIRST class.

Today is all about CAKE: Well and cupcakes, and free Starbucks, and ice cream cake, and champagne, and whipped cream and anything and everything delectable. Birthdays only happen once a year so I'm all about indulging. Remember, calories don't count on your birthday, it's in the handbook I checked. #andifyoucelebratesomeoneelseitsonlyhalf

Hope you have a FABULOUS FRIDAY and a wonderful WEEKEND! This is my LAST LIVE post until I get back. However, I have some posts planned, some awesome guests posts and I HOPE, HOPE, HOPE to do some blogging from across the pond. Check back here ever Wednesday for a vacation post, that is my goal and plan for now. Thanks for all the support the past few weeks, y'all have NO IDEA how much your love, good thoughts, good vibes and prayers have meant.

****Sending love, prayers, hope and good vibes to the city of BOSTON today.
We all are BOSTONSTRONG****

**linking up  Here  here , here, here and, this week**

Talk {Back} to Me Tuesday

Morning, friends. I hope you're doing well. If you couldn't tell yesterday, I'm a bit behind on life right now. The weekend was so wonderful but so busy and work was all kinds of ridiculous on Monday. I almost went dark today, but didn't want to leave y'all hanging without a lil note of explanation. 

I thought that TODAY y'all could do the talking for or to me. Today is your chance to ask me anything in the comments and I promise to do my best to answer them truthfully [unless they are a bit too personal, haha]. I'll either pull the answer together before our vacation or use it as a post while I'm away. 

Before I leave, I want to leave a lil inspiration for your day. Make it a great one, loves :)!

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